Counting Potatoes

Counting Potatoes

Its something most people do for most of their lives. A story goes that for every person you hate, for every real or imagined 'wrong' you intend to set right, and for every regret or frustration we carry around, there is a potato that hangs from your neck. Angst filled and emo driven people have a whole necklace of them. Quarrelsome people carry them as talismans of bravery and pride. Martyrs drown themselves in them while gossip mongers collect them.

Listen to the buzz around you. Seldom would you hear neighbors talking about the current financial crisis or political situation. Take notice of what gets talked about during family gatherings and Long distance calls. I'll bet most of what you'll hear isnt about good tidings and cheer. If you listen closely enough, you could almost hear the potatoes roll on the ground all the way up to their necks.

The funny thing about all these potatoes hanging around people's necks is the fact that when they begin to rot and give off that fart-like smell, most people would rather suffer its smell their whole lives rather than throw the whole bunch away. In fact, some people would even go around hooking up with other potato-ladened people to discuss the rotting potatoes on their necks, add yet more potatoes and sometimes wonder why their lives are filled with that pervading stink.


The potatoes can even come from people we dont know or events we only hear about. My father spends a considerable time watching the news. Just the other day, he saw this piece about the PNP, jokjok volante and a whole lot of cash... WHHHAAMMM!! one potato assimilated! Got himself all riled up all afternoon in the process and the whole country didnt care.


A group of our relatives has that nasty habit of coveting their neighbor's goods. Having mastered the art of obsessing over the number of piglets, sacks of palay, parked vehicles, home improvements and other things of note in their neighbor's property, they have made it their mission to come up with 101 ways of how to seize the coveted property - from legal means to outright use of force, from being two-faced 'friends' to outright smear campaigns. The neighbors in question know about this but just dont care. They've just recently added 3 piglets to their investments. Our relatives in turn got 3 additional potatoes around their necks.


As for me. I try my best not to collect potatoes and have conciously thrown away most of those that have accumulated over the years. I have found that a potatoeless life is a lot less complicated, a lot happier and gives the most odds of success. I have also realized that losing sleep because of anger, frustration, regrets or hate is not only a miserable way to spend the night but quite pointless too.


Now I find most things that used to disrupt my inner peace quite funny. Used to fume about bitchy salesladies and swindler taxi drivers. Now I find it funny that these people will ultimately have to live with the consequences of their shortcomings. 10 years from now, they'll probably still be bitchy salesladies and unprincipled drivers - only 10 years older, with a lot less opportunities still open and 10,000 more potatoes around their necks. That in itself is a sweeter revenge than anything I could come up with. He he


I still take notice of all the potatoes rolling around though - all destined to be on somebody's neck. Sometimes I even take the time to muse about some of them as they roll by, wondering if a life of potato stink is worth it for some people. So if by chance you see me downtown, staring at something with a goofy smile on my face, please walk on by. I'm probably collecting info for a new blog, laughing my ass off in my mind while counting them potatoes as they roll by.

	Counting Potatoes