Counting Potatoes

Yamashita Treasure: the hunt for the fool's gold

Nobody talks about it much.. Especially the families involved or were involved but the hunt of Yamashita's gold pervades the whole spectrum of our society. From the richest to the poorest, from the most educated to the least and from the highest in political offices to ordinary people like us. Hell, even Marcos and Mac Arthur was involved in its hunt more than half a century ago. I guess there's just something about the thought of bars of gold that rewires our brains.

Right this moment, I'll bet there are hundreds of pinoys all over the nation digging somewhere and everywhere, playing Nicholas Cage's role in National Treasure. I'll even bet that some of these were or even are your relatives or neighbors. Yup! Don't deny it! Almost every family I know has been involved or knows other families who were involved with this national past time at one time or another. In fact, just last year, a close family friend got heavily involved in it and another relative [separate situation] almost got snared. Upon deeper reflection, you can almost imagine the Philippines as a nation full of holes and mole like pinoys extending the network. No wonder we're in a sinking ship! He he

Anyway, if you're one of the un-yamashitad pinoys, you can easily spot these yamashita driven people by [of course] the holes they are driving into the ground. Admittedly, some will be on legitimate business but look out for those who have weak excuses like those digging a 'septic tank' out in the middle of nowhere, those who are suddenly interested in building a 'basement' under their houses, those who suddenly pour lots of money in a faraway 'construction site' or 'quarry', etc. Upon inspection, if you find the hole too deep and too narrow and the diggers too uncommunicative, chances are, you've found a Yamashita Hole.

And if you're one of those who'll get involved in this in the future [one never knows, he he], know these: Yamashita treasure hunts usually rest on two different premises. One is a 'treasure map' and the other one 'divine inspiration' from enchanted beings like nuno sa punsos or beings from the 3rd dimension [like kokey, he he]. The stories may differ but the techniques, the scams and the process are pretty much the same [watch out for these]:

1. The Map and The Seeker

Two of the most important components of a yamashita treasure hunt. A map [which should at least look old and should reflect how the vicinity looked like more than 50 years ago], so if you see mcdonalds or diversion road on the map, be on your guard. Do check the accuracy of landmarks too like trees, rocks and streams [they may have not even existed 50 years ago]

The map will almost always come with an old looking, tobacco munching seeker too [or a local guide]. He will be the one charged to fill your head with thoughts of gold, interpret the otherwise usual looking rocks and disseminate the 'colorful and mysterious' history of the area. Be on guard of plots and storylines that sounds too much as those written in pinoy komiks, he he. Ask yourself too why he didnt just dig it in the first place and built a mansion and a pool for himself instead of babysitting starry eyed treasure hunters like you.

2. The Gold Brick

Hand in hand with the old map sometimes is an authenthic looking gold brick [special effects]. The seeker may just let you take a peek at it [wrapped as it is in banana leaves or newspapers], sometimes he may even let you hold it. DONT get your hopes up too high! Most people fall for this scam because they WANT to believe its real Gold.

Keep your cool and don't get too excited. Pretend that you have experience in handling gold by:

A. Biting the gold bar: if its 18 carats and above, you'll see your teethmarks on the bar, if its 18 carats and below, you'll see your teeth left on the bar.

B. Putting some makeup or foundation at the back of your hand and rubbing it against the gold. The chemicals react with gold and turns the foundation a dark brown or gray color.

C. Drilling at a random spot in the gold bar and checking if the bar isnt just lead plated with gold. Of course, if its real gold, then its your problem how to get those drilled chips back in place.

D. Having the bar or sample undergo an acid test composed of nitric and hydrochloric acid [sometimes you can buy a kit from the local pawnshop or jeweler], gold turns dark brown in this test. Dont spill the acid on your skin else you'll be the one who'll turn dark brown.

3. The Registration Fee and Opening Rituals

At the heart of all scams is separating you from your hard earned money - thus the registration fee that you will have to pay upfront so that they can perform their rituals [offerings to the spirits who guard the gold], mining equipment, labor upkeep, tools, chemicals, etc, etc, etc.

While this may seem sensible at first. Consider that if the gold is buried in your property, it is THEM that should be paying you for the right to dig in your property and extract something of value. This is how oil, mining companies and power companies do it. They pay the property owners huge sums to let them use his property. On a last note, In all my years of studying mining eng'g, I've never heard of mining companies making offerings to spiritual beings before the dig either. Offerings to politicians is more likely, he he

4. The Magical Gold Detector Stick

You'll also see the gold detector contraption which is just composed of two sticks held by a person. Something that also wasnt taught to us in mining class. Seismic surveys, mineral tracer prospecting, or exploratory drillings maybe but two sticks for gold detection??? They could get rich just by selling those sticks to mining companies if that's true! Try to hide some gold jewelry in your pocket, stand close and see if the sticks will point to your crotch, he he

5. Mercury Rising

These people will also have you believe that you need to give some money so that they can buy some mercury, a compound they say that will point the way to the gold when poured.

Now, mercury may be one of the most misunderstood chemicals in human history [it has even been used as an immortality drink by a chinese emperor - he died of mercury poisoning, hehe] but it sure doesnt move over the ground and slides toward the gold when poured!

Mercury is a flotation chemical for gold - no more no less. It is applied to crushed rocks [not gold bars!] and acts pretty much the same way as soap suds in your washing machine. The gold particles [not bars] sticks to the mercury foam where they can be collected. Try hiding some jewelry in your pockets again and see if the mercury slithers up your pants, he he [run for your life if it does ha ha ha!]

6. The Mysterious Stone Markers and Rocks

Now and again, the diggers will also show you some rocks that they claim are markers that the japanese have left behind. Rocks with x indentations, large rocks grouped together, stone slabs with signs that say "slow down gold 20 meters ahead" or "ichiro the jap digger was here". Anything to convince you that humans have dug this way before. If you think about it, if we try hard enough, we'll always end up seeing what we want to see - a cloud shaped like a naked woman, a glimpse of our future in chicken entrails, lotto numbers in cow turd, etc, etc, etc. So do be wary when they show you these, show enough enthusiasm and they'll think of new expenses and stories to separate you from your dough.

7. The Layers and Japanese Traps

Mysterious rock layers, japanese traps, underground gas, spooky stories, all the works! Keep in mind though that since you're not going down that narrow, scary looking hole, who's to say that these stories are true?

Here's a tip though, if the surrounding area has been disturbed by a dig in human history, there should be a discontinuity in the rock layers in the ground where the original tunnel was, moreover, there should be at least some evidence that humans have worked there before like traces of timber supports, rock bolts, tools, straight edges, etc. If you see the regular top soil, sedimentary and bedrock layers, chances are, you're also digging a perfectly regular hole going regularly nowhere.

8. The Yamashita Diggers Depot

As I've said, all the works! He he, you'll be asked to chip in money for gas masks, detectors, wall support materials, timbers, helmets, spades, bulldozers, cables, cranes, boots, lamps, submersible pumps, etc, etc, etc, etc.

I've commented once to someone who was digging that I'll bet I'll get rich quicker by selling or renting out Yamashita Gold digging equipment, materials and supplies than by digging for one myself. I'll even offer discounts for those who rent the equipment in sets [manequins outfitted with miner get up will be displayed on the store front], and also offer mining seminars and training for labor, he he. The yamashita treasure hunter didnt appreciate the joke.

9. The 'Sliding' Gold and the Gold come back ' Choir

The gold bars fuckin moves and slides! This makes the dig a limited time offer and adds some urgency to your spending! I can almost imagine these people speaking like those weird men I see in TV home shopping networks. He he

"But wayt! There's morah! If you spend roiyt nowah we'll give you the gold bars for free!" "all these for only $2, 499 [your life savings]!! An amazing low low price for all them gold bars moving below your property!" "hurry! Else your neighbor grabs this amazing offah!"

Consider though.. If the gold bars are moving.. Then what use are the fuckin markers for??? More so the F*ckin Treasure map??? Do these markers move in tandem with the gold??? And why would the japs bury their gold in a place where they cant find it when they come back??

Ah but the gold can be made to stop moving and even rise close to the surface! All you need is to hire the services of a Gold Come Back Choir! They'll sing and they'll dance to get those gold bars for you.. This is the pinoy equivalent of the Indian Rain Dance and a more expensive and less interesting way to spend your money on dancers. I'll prefer a lap dance from a nice looking girl anytime, thank you. When I spend that much, I expect to ejaculate.

10. The Breakthrough, The Rope, and the Catch.

Now comes the funny part, he he. They'll say the Gold bars are already found and all they need to to is to tie a rope [not a heavy duty metal chain] around the box to lift it. O_o Why they just dont bring the bars brick by brick to the surface where you can sell it piece by piece and maintain cashflow and THEN buy a dozen dozers??!, I dont understand. Perhaps this is so that they'll have another reason to continue to suspense [ie, the rope broke - of course it will given the weight of gold bars, they had to cut the rope because authorities or bad people we're sniffing around the area, they can't bring the gold to the surface because selling it will attract attention, etc, etc, etc]

So for all their stories, their promises, your expenses and sleepless nights - all you're going to end up is a piece of rope peeking at the surface supposedly tied to the bars of gold [which you'll never see and cannot ever sell] and a couple more stories why you cannot get the gold or tell anyone about it to round up your yamashita experience.

By this time you'll be out of money [they always stick around till the very end] and out of further options. The Yamashita guide, the diggers and the dancers will move on to the next starry eyed yamashita treasure hunter. And the hole [with the rope peeking] will join the countless other holes all around the country that stands testament to our national stupidity when it comes to financial matters.







[note: i'm not saying that the yamashita treasure is a complete fabrication of some lambanog infused japanese soldier or komiks driven lolo, with the heavy infusion of scammers into this activity combined with the lack of scientific and historically accurate foundation of most digs, MOST yamashita treasure hunts have zero probability of success. And hard earned resources that could've sent the kids to school, built a business, cultivated a farm or earned profits as investments [all of which have a MUCH much higher chance of ROI] are drained through these 'dream' holes. Some of us would rather bet our hard earned resources as well as our family's future on low probability digs rather than trust and hone our own capabilities on CREATING wealth using our intellect and sweat.]

	Yamashita Treasure: the hunt for the fool's gold